How to stop being driven when there are so many irritants in the modern world? The work is tired, the parents do not understand, the loved one himself is in the same position, and even some kind of nonsense happens additionally. How can you not be nervous? However, since you are reading this article, you are on the right track. Without understanding your problem, you cannot solve it. First you need to understand why you are worried.
The nature of fear
We are nervous because of the fear of losing or not getting what we want. Fear arises when a person imagines an unfavorable outcome of a situation. Most often, nothing has happened yet, and we are already afraid. Sounds silly, but that's how our brains work. Constant fears cause anxiety, and anxiety causes stress. The latter carries a lot of consequences:
- Decreased immunity and disease.
- Self-doubt.
- Psychological illness.
- Problems with others.
Do you need it? Of course not. Therefore, one has to applyefforts to improve the quality of your life. Remember the consequences before you drive for any reason, it will become easier to stop and stop yourself.
Reasons for corrals
Let's highlight the main situations that do not allow us to stop being sad and driven. It will not be possible to cover everything, but you can independently draw an analogy for your case.
So, often we care:
- Own appearance. The hair lay imperfectly, the nail broke, the fat was deposited in the wrong place.
- Other people. They didn’t understand us, we didn’t understand them, how could they do this, why they like it, etc.
- Self-realization. I wanted the best, but it turned out so-so. Annoying.
- Environment. It started raining, the elevator broke, the tram blocked the road, so you were late, wet and very tired.
- Relationship with your loved one. How to stop being driven into relationships is a separate topic, but we will cover the main points.
Appearance
In social networks and TV, we see very beautiful people and we want to be like them. However, often behind a photo of a beauty there is high-quality makeup and a photo editor, and in life she has a very simple appearance, overgrown manicure and overdried hair. Of course, there are always prettier people, but there are also those whose appearance is inferior to yours. Therefore, no matter how hackneyed this phrase may sound, do not compare yourself with others.
Other people are just as focused on themselves as you are. If you cut off a couple of extra centimeters at the hairdresser, no onewill notice, and if he notices, he will almost immediately forget. No one is perfect, so it's time to stop being driven over trifles. It is much more important that the image as a whole be harmonious: clothes of a suitable color and shape, clean shoes, refreshing makeup.
Besides, appearance is a fickle advantage. In the morning we are less and less attractive, and time spares no one. Find your strengths and focus on them.
Relationships with people
It can be very difficult to understand another person. The fact is that the brain of different people can vary greatly in volume and number of zones responsible for certain processes. This means that your interlocutor may perceive information in a completely different way. Even if you hear the same phrase, you may draw completely different conclusions.
However, respect is important to everyone. Try to put yourself in the person's shoes when they share their thoughts and worries. Listen carefully, even if he annoys you. You will definitely see the payoff. Just do this experiment: shift the focus of attention from yourself to someone else. It will no longer be possible to start driving as before.
Self Realization
Things do not always go smoothly at work or school, not everything works out the first time. In such a situation, it is worth reminding yourself that the more attempts, the higher the likelihood of success. In life, it often turns out that it is not the most talented who wins, but the hardworking one. Make yourself a plan of action. When an annoying situation occurs, look at your plan. So you remember, forwhat they started. The plan must contain:
- The strategic (long-term) goals you want to achieve. For example, to become a leader.
- Tactical (short-term) goals - how you will achieve strategic goals. For example, fulfilling a sales plan for two years, asking for a raise, etc.
- A fallback when tactical goals don't work. Example: go to competitors if they didn't get a raise.
You should always have an option to retreat, then there will be less reason to be nervous. A plan is a great answer to the question of how to stop being overwhelmed.
Environment
This is perhaps the most uncontrollable aspect of your life. You can't make the rain stop falling, the cork to dissolve, and time to turn back. Therefore, the only and surest option is to score.
When something unexpected happens, breathe out and remember that it's not forever. Moreover, if things are not going well today, then something good will happen soon. This is one of the laws of statistics - the desire for an average level. It means that a negative deviation will definitely be replaced by a positive one in order to restore the balance.
You should never be upset about money and things that are randomly lost or damaged. You will always earn more, plus it's a reason to buy something more attractive.
Relationship with partner
In this case, we will talk about a he althy relationship when both people takeresponsibility for your actions. Here you must understand that since a person is with you, it means that he has already chosen you. In other words, you suit him, he values you. Memorize it as an axiom and always remember in moments of weakness.
On the topic of how to stop being driven into a relationship, the following points can be highlighted:
- Everyone has a bad mood. You are not always the reason for this. Don't push it any further, mind your own business.
- Ask your significant other to tell you right away about anything that doesn't suit him or her in the relationship. Try to correct the situation when you are told about it.
- When you are in a bad mood, tell your loved one right away to avoid misunderstandings.
- Put yourself in the other person's shoes again, try to understand their feelings.
- Be sure to find hobbies or activities that you can think of other than your partner.
anticipate the problem
It is always easier to take preventive measures, while it is difficult to stop driving when the process has already begun. Against the background of failures, any trifle seems essential.
Watch your nervous system. Put the following into your routine:
- Regular rest. A tired person is an angry person. Allow yourself to do what you love, every day for at least 15 minutes.
- Down with stress. Take a bath with aromatic oil, drink mint tea, ask your neighbor to make yousmall massage.
- Focus of attention. Get in the habit of doing something else when bad thoughts pop into your mind. For example, to stop being driven, start squatting 10 times or push-ups. It will be good for the body and brain: muscles will strengthen, endorphins will cheer you up.
- Mark of joy. Draw something on your hand in a conspicuous place, get a tattoo, buy jewelry. Set yourself the mindset to stop worrying about trifles when you look at your mark.
- Awareness. Praise yourself when you succeed. Don't scold, but notice when things don't work out.
- Just a human. Allow yourself to be imperfect. We are all like that, understand and accept it.
Reread from time to time information that is useful and inspiring to you. Work on yourself. You can do it.
