The term "narcissism" first appeared when it was used by the British scientist H. Alice. He described a form of defective personality disorder and related it to the well-known legend of Narcissus, who lived in ancient Greece. He loved himself so much that against this background he was cursed and died.
A little later, Sigmund Freud decided to consider the narcissistic personality type. A well-known psychoanalyst created a theory according to which the narcissistic syndrome manifests itself to one degree or another in every person, including his sexual behavior. He suggested that in adolescence every child feels more narcissistic. Thus, narcissism is an integral part of the character of any person. According to Freud, this form of behavior is not capable of harming others, but only on condition that the child develops in a correct and harmonious way.
Who is Narcissus
Considering the concept of narcissistic mechanisms, first of all, it is worth paying attention to the origins of the word itself. As already mentioned inIn the beginning, according to legend, a certain young man named Narcissus was so in love with himself that he did not hesitate to revel in his splendor. The guy enjoyed talking with young girls who spoke with delight about his amazing appearance. However, he himself never listened to others and did not try to think about how they feel.
One day Narcissus was spending time on the bank of a stream and suddenly saw his own reflection in the water. He fell in love with his beauty so much that he simply could not tear himself away from his image. The guy was gradually drying up from hunger and thirst. He ended up dying.
After his death, in the place where he admired himself, flowers of unusual beauty began to grow, which began to be called daffodils. Since then, the name has become a household name. The behavior of the ancient Greek handsome man fully describes the characteristics of people who today are commonly called narcissistic personalities.
This means high self-esteem and excessive self-love. This term is a complete reflection of a person's tendency to excessive narcissism.
General information
Narcissistic personalities tend to always be in the center of attention of others. They should definitely show everyone how exceptional and individual they are.
Psychologists have been studying this human condition for many years. Specialists show a huge amount of interest in him, because many of them are concerned about how psychologically well people of this type are.
The point isthat very often such selfish natures, who seem to be 100% sure of themselves, actually hide a completely different personality under this bright shell. Very often in psychological practice there are cases in which it becomes clear that egoists have a huge number of complexes, which they simply try to compensate by oppressing others. In this case, we are talking about a hidden narcissistic type.
In psychology, many questions arise regarding this term and the disorder itself. Is narcissism a way to hide your fears? Or is it the innate confidence of a person in his impeccability? It is very difficult to answer this question to this day. However, there is a lot of useful information that will allow you to understand this interesting personality type in more detail.
How to spot a narcissist
Any person in a normal state has tender feelings for himself. However, for some individuals, such narcissism simply begins to go off scale. Such people are in constant self-admiration of themselves. In this case, we are already talking about pathological narcissistic personality disorder.
An egoist is a person who is only interested in his own person. At the same time, he completely ignores the interests and desires of others. In this case, we are talking about the possibility of self-affirmation at the expense of completely different people.
The most striking distinguishing feature of a narcissistic person is a hypertrophied and overly exaggerated sense of self-worth and love for one's person. However, speaking of such personalities, one more important aspect should not be excluded. You need to understand that the ultimate goal of a narcissist is self-satisfaction.
It would be logical to assume that any person strives for this. However, the narcissist will be ready for any tricks and will go over the heads, only to amuse his pride. Very often in psychology a parallel is drawn between egoism and narcissism. Also, some experts attribute this feature of behavior to psychopathy. Accordingly, in this case, narcissism is the definition of one of the scales of the psychopathic state, which is used in the process of research activities. There are 12 signs of a narcissistic personality type. They help to quickly calculate the egoist. It is worth familiarizing yourself with them in more detail.
12 signs of a narcissistic personality type
There are some nuances according to which a narcissist can be identified:
- He will never pay attention to constructive or any other criticism from the people around him.
- This man thinks he's perfect.
- For him, everyone around him is just a servant (or a laughing stock if they do not meet his high criteria).
- He demands and waits for increased attention.
- The narcissistic person needs constant praise.
- He sincerely believes that everyone around him constantly thinks about him and envy him because he is the ideal for everyone.
- If someone does not share his point of view, then it genuinely surprises him.
- He boastseven the most stupid and imaginary achievements, because I am sure that he did something significant.
- He uses strong sarcasm when speaking and often offends others.
- He tends to be obsessed with financial matters.
- For Narcissus, his own status is very important, so he will never associate with ordinary people.
- He is sure that he has absolutely no flaws, but only virtues.
Thus, identifying a person with a narcissistic personality type is not difficult. Therefore, when meeting with such an individual who is prone to excessive self-admiration and increased selfishness, it can be said with certainty that he has a similar defect.
However, it is worth understanding why exactly people experience such a change in the perception of their own "I".
The cause of narcissism
This is not a congenital disorder. People become narcissists as they grow up and realize themselves as individuals. This means that at some point there is a failure, and the person decides to develop only certain characteristics.
As you grow older, a person must learn to be responsible, independent. At the same time, his capriciousness and selfishness develop. However, in a narcissistic child, all positive character traits fade into the background. There is a hypertrophied development of selfishness. Accordingly, such character traits begin to be laid from the earliestchildhood.
There is also a theory that to some extent genetics influence the development of such a disorder. Of course, if the parents of the narcissist are also very selfish personalities, then there is a high probability that their child will grow up to be just as narcissistic. Therefore, in order for the baby not to begin to cultivate narcissistic personality traits in himself, you need to pay attention to him. Parenting requires great effort on the part of parents.
How to prevent the development of narcissism
Since this disorder begins to affect a person from early childhood, it is necessary to adhere to some recommendations that will help raise a worthy person from a child.
First of all, you need to be able to praise your child and prove your love to him. However, do not rejoice in any of his actions. Praise should only be given if the child actually did something meaningful. If parents admire every second everything that their baby does, then this is precisely what can lead to an exaggerated sense of their own exclusivity in this world.
Psychologists recommend that parents, proving their tender feelings to children, never say phrases from the series “I love you because you are so smart, beautiful, etc.” In order for a child to feel loved and desired, it is enough just to recognize the fact that he is loved. No need to constantly instill in him the feeling that he can only be loved for certain qualities. Also, don't try to do everything.wishes and whims of the baby. If he constantly gets everything he wants, then in adulthood the child will expect the same attitude towards himself from the outside world.
Also, experts recommend not to exaggerate the achievements of your baby in one area or another. If he studies well, there is no need to say that he is a straight A student, etc. Such an unjustified overestimation of self-esteem can negatively affect the correct perception of the world by the baby.
To prevent the development of symptoms of a narcissistic disorder, it is necessary to exclude the attitude towards the child as the center of the universe. He must understand that other household members need attention and care. You need to instill these feelings in him, and not just focus your life on his desires.
However, you can not go to extremes. If a child is ignored or even tried to humiliate him psychologically, then this may well lead to the opposite effect. If too many complexes develop in him in early childhood, this will eventually lead to the development of a narcissistic defense in him. He will act selfish as he has not received the love and attention he deserves.
It is necessary to teach the child to be sociable. If he walks on the playground with other kids, he should treat them with respect and not react aggressively if someone made him this or that remark. By instilling these character traits, you can be sure that the child will grow up to be a decent person.
How narcissism manifests itself based on gender
Most people are surethat narcissism is a trait that is unique to women. However, you need to understand that if a girl looks in the mirror for a long time, then this does not mean that she suffers from a personality disorder. You need to understand that in the fair sex, such a pathology manifests itself in a slightly different form.
For example, if, when building a relationship with a member of the opposite sex, she gives preference not to the guy who she likes best, but to the one who indulges her whims more, then in this case we are talking about selfishness and excessive ambition.
Often, in women, narcissistic traits appear at a time when partners have a small child. As a rule, in this case, the mother begins to try to realize all unfulfilled dreams through the baby. She is so proud of him that this pride passes to her. The mother believes that it is only thanks to her that the baby has succeeded. Therefore, very often on the playground you can hear the conversations of young mothers who proudly talk about the achievements of their children.
If we consider male narcissism, then, as a rule, this type of disorder is most pronounced in adolescence. If a guy stands in front of a mirror for a long time and pays too much attention to his hair, body, etc., then this is a manifestation of narcissism.
If we are talking about men who have already taken place as husbands and fathers, then in this case it is worth paying attention to their behavior with children. As a rule, such people start less timeto spend with the kids, because they experience a very strong feeling of jealousy, realizing that now the place of the "center of the universe" is occupied by a new family member. As a rule, when narcissists acquire families, the personality disorder begins to move to a new level. As a rule, they rarely communicate with their loved ones, as they are sure that the whole world should revolve only around them.
If the narcissist has not been able to find his soul mate, then over the years he will gradually begin to understand that perhaps he is not as irresistible as he might have thought before. However, it is very common to meet 40-year-old bachelors who are absolutely unclaimed by the representatives of the opposite sex, who still continue to claim that they are simply in search of an ideal that could match them.
Types of Narcissistic Disorder
It should be noted right away that modern psychoanalysts continue to consider this so-called pathology to this day. Narcissism is still a rather mysterious phenomenon, and it is studied by scientists around the world. However, several varieties of this personality disorder have already been identified.
Narcissism happens:
- Constructive. In this case, we are talking about a state when a person is characterized by quite adequate self-esteem and narcissism. This means that the person loves himself to a high enough degree, but at the same time he is still able to interact with the outside world. However, due to increased self-confidence inunder pressure from others, a person can behave quite aggressively.
- Destructive. With this type of narcissistic character, a person has much more serious mental disorders. In this case, the person is not able to realistically assess their own significance, as well as achievements. People of this type pathologically need to have their importance confirmed every minute by the outside world.
- Deficient. This form of narcissism is expressed in the fact that a person is not able to evaluate himself as a whole person. This type of disorder is different from the previous ones. Such people are very dependent on the opinions of others. Therefore, they behave selfishly, because they believe that in this case, society will respect them more.
- Perverse. In this case, we are talking about the so-called malignant condition. A person can be overcome by absolutely inadequate, sometimes even obsessive ideas. Such people behave aggressively in the most unexpected situations. They also have somatic disorders.
Is narcissism a disease or a trait
On the one hand, this syndrome can really be regarded as a feature of a person. This is explained by the fact that, according to many teachings, selfishness is characteristic of any person from the moment of his birth. However, on the other hand, we are talking about a complete personality disorder, as a person begins to perceive himself as something higher and more significant than those around him. If we are talking about progressive narcissism, then in this case it is certainly a disease that can turnthe existence of an individual into an unbearable life, as well as negatively affect his entire environment.
If a person has excessive narcissism, then in this case it is necessary to contact a psychologist who will help you learn to perceive yourself in a normal way. This, of course, is about narcissistic personality disorder, which can be adequately treated. If the therapy is successful, then the person has a chance for a normal existence.
There is also a theory that narcissism is a behavioral defect. However, there are many other opinions. For example, some experts describe narcissism as a syndrome. Accordingly, these scientists consider this state of the human psyche from the point of view of psychoanalysis. Even Sigmund Freud proved that such manifestations are characteristic of any person.
However, it is worth noting that earlier in their research, scientists simply did not consider the symptoms of narcissistic personality disorder as a dangerous condition. However, over time everything has changed. Today, narcissism is really becoming not even a disorder, but a full-fledged mental illness. Moreover, in this case we are talking about a pathology that can lead to a rather dangerous condition. For example, if a narcissist is not satisfied and does not see that others admire him, then in this case he may fall into a deep depression.
Based on this, we need to take this problem very seriously and consider ways to solve it.
Diagnosis
If we consider the narcissistic character as a disease, then any diagnostic measures will be the same as when a person develops a pathology. First of all, the specialist conducts an external examination of a potential patient. After that, a so-called structured interview is conducted, which helps the psychiatrist or psychologist analyze the answers, as well as the behavioral characteristics of the person. After that, the specialist can compare all the data obtained, evaluate the psychology of the narcissistic personality and come to the conclusion whether this psychological disorder is dangerous or just a slightly exaggerated feature of a particular patient.
As a rule, selfishness is quite easy to detect after the first conversation. Usually a person with a similar defect categorically denies having such a problem. The diagnosis is complicated by the fact that the patient does not adequately respond to the recommendations of a specialist and behaves rather sharply in case of criticism. However, the doctor must carry out all the necessary tests in order to exclude the possibility of antisocial behavior or pathology that borders on a hysterical disorder.
You need to understand that a person with a narcissistic personality type is, by and large, a sick patient. Therefore, it is quite understandable that he does not understand that he is suffering from some kind of unpleasant pathology that he needs to exclude. By and large, this condition can be compared with alcoholism. However, as in the case of the use of strong drinks,this problem needs to be addressed immediately.
How to deal with narcissism
In this case, it all depends on the individual situation. If we are talking about a chronic mental disorder, then the treatment will be long and rather difficult. Although a person needs psychological help, he does not yet perceive himself as a problematic person. For him, a narcissistic attitude towards others is a boon.
Therefore, such people do not voluntarily go for treatment. The specialist will have to work hard to find an approach to such a patient.
As a rule, psychologists try to demonstrate benevolence and the deepest respect towards the patient. This bribes him, and he comes to the next appointment in order to receive another portion of flattery.
Psychotherapy shows good results. Classes can be held both individually and in group form. First of all, the essence of the problem is explained to the patients, and gradually the doctor brings them to the recognition of the pain of their condition. Once the patient accepts the diagnosis, treatment is much faster.
Together with a doctor, a person suffering from narcissism finds a constructive solution that helps him lower his self-esteem a little to the required level. However, it is very important that the specialist can correctly understand the cause of the disease and try to exclude it. If this fails, the patient will refuse treatment and will never come back for a session.
If we talk about drug treatment, then it is used only inif the patient suffers from a depressive disorder, he develops panic attacks, phobias and other dangerous mental disorders. In this case, a course of tranquilizers or antidepressants may be prescribed. However, you need to understand that drugs are not able to eliminate narcissism. In this situation, the state of a person is only facilitated so that he does not reach the extreme point.
Prevention
The narcissistic personality type is an extremely interesting topic for many specialists. During the study of this feature of behavior, doctors were able to draw up an approximate picture of the development of the defect. To prevent such a pathology, it is necessary to avoid factors that can make a person more selfish. First of all, it concerns childhood. Parents should provide a harmonious upbringing for the baby. The child must understand that he is loved, but at the same time, responses are expected from him. This means that you can not always indulge your beloved child. Sometimes you have to say no.
You need to strike a balance. Of course, the kid must learn self-respect and the ability to defend his point of view. However, he must take part in the discussion on an equal footing with the other interlocutor. This means that he must respect not only his parents, but also his peers. By instilling the right values in a child, one can develop a strong but decent personality. If parents do not know how to behave properly, it is worth contacting a specialist. He will tell you which behavior model will be best for raising a particular baby. In some situations, the parents themselves will need to undergo several appointments with a psychologist.
