How to be positive: basic personality traits, advice from psychologists

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How to be positive: basic personality traits, advice from psychologists
How to be positive: basic personality traits, advice from psychologists

Video: How to be positive: basic personality traits, advice from psychologists

Video: How to be positive: basic personality traits, advice from psychologists
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It is impossible to be a successful, in-demand person or become a magnet for good, positive events if you start each day with negative thoughts and let life's complexities get carried away. Not everyone at birth is given the ability to think positively in all situations, but the opportunity to develop an optimistic attitude is within the power of even an avid pessimist. You just need to tune in to a long process and learn to enjoy each new victory over the old, dull "I".

grandma with balloons
grandma with balloons

Why it's important to be cheerful

A positive person, first of all, is a free, independent person. She is motivated to achieve and has a plan for her movement towards the goal. Positive people rarely get sick and, having the same 24 hours in a day as other people, manage to put much more meaning into every day they live,than others - in their somehow stretched out month.

Everyone noticed that next to a person whose life mood always sounds on high notes, there are never embittered, gloomy friends or soul mates. The fact is that pessimists, whose deformed energy field is inactive, cannot withstand the strongest energy of positive people and prefer to keep their distance. Therefore, optimists are often surrounded by acquaintances who share their views on life and make up a close-knit team of like-minded people.

Man holding a sign with a smiley
Man holding a sign with a smiley

How to understand your capabilities

How to be positive? People cannot live at the same pace, but often they themselves do not know how fast they can move forward. Hence the overestimated demands on oneself or, conversely, the underestimation of the volume of tasks to the level of “like that guy”. To catch their own growth dynamics, a person needs to temporarily let go of control over his life - stop taking an active part in all events at once.

For a week or two, you should go about your usual duties at work and at home, but without emphasizing responsibility for what is not within the scope of necessary manipulation. After a while, the body itself will make it clear about the degree of lack of activity and the pace can be increased - and so on until its own norm is developed, which is no longer recommended to cross.

Live in the present

How to be positive? Refuse lengthy excursions into the past and try to less often guess about tomorrow. That whichwhat happened yesterday cannot be changed, and future events are determined precisely by the current moment that is happening at this minute. Therefore, you should focus all your attention on the present and solve, first of all, urgent tasks, and not those that are in the distant future.

A person should always pay attention to the feelings that occupy him at the moment. If you are sad now, then you need to figure out why, and be sure to devote at least a few minutes to your feeling to the detriment of other things. Postponing their immediate needs (even if it's just a need to talk, cry, drink tea), a person learns to push himself into the background.

Elderly people drink tea
Elderly people drink tea

Take responsibility for your life

Positive development is impossible without taking responsibility for your choice, because in the case when the decision comes from another person, the feeling of satisfaction from the execution of this decision also has to be divided in two. A person needs to recognize that what happens in his life is the result of his own filter. And then he will not have to waste time and mental strength searching for the guilty if something went wrong, or jealously hide his success from other participants in a successful choice.

True, there is one serious nuance. Yes, a person has the right to choose what to do, but he is not responsible for someone else's choice that influenced his life, or force majeure events that mixed all optimistically built plans. Therefore, it is necessary to clearly separate the concepts of responsibility for one's decisions andresponsible for correcting errors caused by third-party factors. In the second case, the situation is considered and decided from the point of view of "I do what I can, what I can not do - I do not." And there should be no feeling of guilt.

Mother with daughter
Mother with daughter

Step out of your comfort zone

Among the most common positive advice, the "leave your comfort zone" formula is number one. What does it mean? Some psychologists view the exit from the state of comfort as a series of steps beyond yesterday's self, however, to develop a positive attitude, it is not at all necessary and even dangerous to step over your “I don’t want to.”

Any action that is not included in his algorithm of daily movement in a circle, a person should consider from two positions: "I'm interested in this" or "I'm not interested in this." And even if everyone is skydiving, but he alone is not at all captivated, there will be little benefit from such self-overcoming. But for something that arouses interest and a sea of positive emotions, even with the mere thought of trying, learning, experiencing, you don’t need to spare any resources. Such motivation will be useful for the formation of positive thinking for a long time and will leave the desire to lift the curtain of the unknown from time to time.

Choosing a funny emoticon
Choosing a funny emoticon

Change tactics

Another important point in reasoning about how to be positive relates to what psychologists call repetitive life situations. This is when it seems to a person that he is haunted through life by the same failures that arise ininterpretations of various events and persons. You can influence this state of affairs only by changing your own strategy of behavior in the area that will certainly lead to disappointment.

An unfinished situation, abandoned in the form in which it still represents a problem, is sure to return, such is the law of the Universe. For example, if a young person drops out of school every time he fails an exam the first time, he will invariably face the same problem again and again and never get an education. What is the way out of this? Ending a painful situation, taking one step further than you could before, or even going the wrong way, but going the other way, is up to the circumstances.

Girl writes a letter
Girl writes a letter

Find yourself

To follow this positive advice from psychologists, a person must first decide what makes him happy now and whether it is possible to project his desire to do what he loves for the rest of his life. Does it generate income? Will it still be relevant in 5, 10 years?

You can conduct such a test - imagine yourself in 5-7 years and describe the image that has arisen in a few exact phrases. As a rule, people see themselves as a successful, fashionably dressed person in an interesting profession, a managerial position, or working for themselves. Then the subject needs to answer the question: how much does the resulting picture correspond to the direction in which he is currently working? Is it possible, for example, to turn from a postman without great ambitions into the head of a pharmaceutical company?

Shoulddiscard the illusion that the whole life is still ahead: you need to start immediately, as soon as the awareness of the future self has come. There is no need to give yourself indulgence - wait until the desired vacancy itself finds its hero or the spouse, who pulls down with his pessimism, suddenly withdraws. You need to leave a bad job, remove people who prevent you from moving forward, remove them from your life without regret.

Decision is action, that's the whole formula of the turning mechanism that can move mountains on the way to success.

positive girl
positive girl

Top tips on how to be positive

Many people, especially introverts, find it difficult to decide on drastic changes in their lives, so before taking such drastic steps as leaving a job they hate or completely changing their field of activity, they need to learn how to equip their space.

Here are some important tips on how to become a positive person, for those who are just preparing for major changes:

  • you should more often accept offers from friends to go somewhere fun;
  • even during hard working days, you need to find a few minutes to call relatives and friends just to talk;
  • you can become the creator of your own traditions - for example, every Friday, no matter what, go to a cafe on the street corner and eat your favorite dessert there;
  • you need to figure out people in your environment who are constantly consumed by negativity, and in every possible way avoid communicating with them;
  • it is important to learn from every event, even completelyunpleasant, learn from the future.

You don't have to spend all your time waiting for something bigger to come, some special luck or recognition. If you do not learn to appreciate what is already present in life at the moment, then you can easily miss the improvements that will gradually come to replace the usual way.

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