How to relax and start living today: step-by-step recommendations and features

2024 Author: Miguel Ramacey | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 06:11

No one escapes anxiety about tomorrow, anxiety about past events, fears of illness, helplessness or poverty. One way or another, but not a single person on the planet is spared depressing thoughts about the past and the future, which prevents them from fully living today.

In addition, the unfortunate circumstances of the present time seem to many to be an obstacle to the realization of their life plans, and as a result, the achievement of the goal is postponed to a foggy distant future, when there will be any changes and the situation will become more favorable. Acquiring the habit of thinking in terms of the past or the future, a person does not live for today, he deprives himself of the opportunity to act immediately, losing precious time.

Carnegie Topic

Efforts for tomorrow's work are being made today. And the right waypreparation for future events will be the concentration of one's strengths and abilities on how to best accomplish today's affairs. But not even the most detailed article will teach how to leave fears about the future and stop worrying about the past; how to stop fussing over trifles; how to profit from your losses and not suffer from criticism or ingratitude? How to learn to live today fully and happily, stopping the flow of worries and meaningless experiences?

About anxiety as one of the problems that prevent relaxation, calmness and undermine self-confidence, as well as overcoming anxiety and controlling it, in 1948 Dale Carnegie wrote a wonderful work. He was a lecturer, educator, writer, the first of the founders of the philosophy of success, as well as the developer of the theory of communication and self-improvement. His book on how to start living today without worry has helped many thousands of people and remains, despite the year of its publication, relevant to this day.

Carnegie Method

Carnegie spent seven years preparing material for this book. It was written as a textbook for attendees of his seminars, and the author did not count on its wide popularity. Noticing that for most of his listeners, uncontrolled anxiety prevents them from achieving success and overcoming problems, Carnegie began to explore this topic.

But it turned out that the subject had not been studied, and there was not much literature, and the available material had no practical application. Then Carnegie founded at his coursesthe world's first laboratory for the study of anxiety problems and comprehended this mental phenomenon for more than five years. Thousands of people from various fields of activity were interviewed orally and in writing - students of courses held in 170 American and Canadian cities. About how people, having overcome their fears and anxieties, live today with pleasure, Carnegie spoke with many interlocutors. Among them were such prominent personalities as Generals Omar Bradley and Mark Clark, the legendary boxer Jack Dempsey, the famous industrialist Henry Ford, the wife of the President and the world's first female diplomat Eleanor Roosevelt, one of America's first and highest paid journalist Dorothy Dix. The life experiences of all these people, the author himself, as well as processed material from hundreds of biographies and statements of historical figures became the basis of the book.

The result was a unique collection of effective recipes and at the same time a practical guide on how to stop worrying and start enjoying life from today. Carnegie's recommendations really work. This is confirmed by the time and experience of a huge number of people. Over 95% of later published articles and books on the same subject have become just reworked material from this wonderful work.

Nothing new

However, there is nothing new or unexpected in the book, especially for the modern reader. This is a well-known truth for a long time: anxiety leads to mental disorders andphysical illnesses; resentment against others oppresses and complicates life; after collecting all the facts and making a decision, you should act immediately; the ability to relax will prevent fatigue and tension; there are no win-win situations; one should not miss the moment provided by life, and many others.

The problem of the majority is inaction, not ignorance. And the purpose of the book is not only to formulate, illustrate with examples and modernize many unshakable truths, but to motivate, stir up and force the reader to apply these truths, start working on improving the quality of their life, making it happier. This Carnegie succeeded phenomenally. Skillfully and simply, the material presented by him really makes people who have read the book change their attitude towards their own lives and those around them.

And the first two chapters are about why you need to live in today and how to find a way out of those situations that are associated with anxiety.

"Compartment" of today's day

The past is dead, it cannot be changed by today's suffering. Spending mental strength and energy on nervous anxiety about the past is a senseless burden. The future has not come, it does not exist. But it is being created now. Therefore, only today is important, not burdened with the burden of “yesterday” and “tomorrow.”

Carnegie, among a number of examples, cited the words of the most successful physician William Osler, Oxford Royal Professor and professor at three other universities. He confessed to his students that his success was not the result of a specialmentality, but the result of the desire to ensure that each of his, Osler, day was an impenetrable compartment, isolated from all other days.

Osler compared the human body to an ocean liner sailing through dangerous, unpredictable waters. During a storm, the captain operates a mechanism that blocks the compartments of the ship with impenetrable bulkheads. Water that gets into one compartment does not penetrate into the rest, which protects the ship from flooding. The professor told the students that people were given a more perfect mechanism that protects against worldly storms and that they should learn to manage. At every stage of life's journey, it is necessary to close the bulkheads that separate the present from the dead days of yesterday and the unborn days of tomorrow. Not everyone, even a very strong person, is able to bear today's burden, adding to it the burden of the past and the future. Happy and successful is a person who lives today, his days are productive and filled with meaning.

Carrier method

A crisis situation that requires immediate decision and action causes most people to panic. The state when the solid ground leaves under the feet, paralyzes the ability to concentrate. Rage, indignation or apathy, melancholy with complaints of unfortunate fate become a frequent reaction to unexpectedly difficult circumstances. Millions of people have ruined their lives by being unable to think and act to change what happened.

The founder of applied psychology, Professor W. James, recommended reconciling with the situation that had happened, because, having accepted the existing as inevitable,a person gets the opportunity for the next stage: to think soberly and overcome the consequences of any difficult situation.

Carnegie cites the method developed and presented to him by the engineer Carrier, who once found himself in a seemingly hopeless situation. What was at stake was his firm, or at the very least, large monetary losses. During a period of days of fear and panic, Carrier suddenly imagined the worst that could happen. He could lose his company and he would have to look for a job. But several serious firms would gladly hire him as an excellent specialist. He decided, if necessary, to come to terms with it. Suddenly Carrier realized that he suddenly relaxed and felt peaceful. The engineer then focused on a solution that could save the day. He no longer worried and was absorbed only in the current task. Carrier found a way out and not only saved the enterprise, but also made a considerable profit.

Magic Formula

Based on the Carrier method, which the engineer himself has successfully applied for over 30 years, Carnegie proposed a simple formula to overcome anxiety in a difficult situation, gain calmness, the ability to think and act logically:

1. One should imagine and fully realize the worst events that will result from the situation.
2. Tune in to reconcilewith this worst if it becomes inevitable. Relaxing and freeing thoughts, getting out of the blinding darkness of anxiety is possible only by realizing that the worst situation will have to be reconciled if necessary. Then energy is released, wasted on anxiety about the future and indignation about what happened.
3. After that, it will be possible to calmly consider what means to apply to change the situation.

For decades, this formula has helped many thousands of people stand on their feet in the unexpected storm of everyday adversity, allowing them to think, decide, act under the most difficult circumstances.

The book has 27 chapters that can be combined with a single call: "Get rid of worries, live for today!" The quotations, lively examples, and stories in Carnegie's book make it a fascinating textbook. It reveals the secret of how to analyze the mechanism of anxiety, control it and find peace of mind, enjoying today.