They say that an insecure person can be seen from afar. What are the signs that a person suffers from low self-esteem? Behavior, gestures, attitudes and clothes give out a person. In this article, you will learn about all the signs of an insecure man.
Reasons
Any effect must have a cause. If a man is unsure of himself, it means that someone inspired him that such behavior is considered normal. Why is a man insecure? Here are the main reasons:
- Hyper parental care. The boy grew up under the strict control of his mother and never made decisions on his own.
- Strict parents. If a mother in childhood scolds a boy for any offense, in adulthood a person will not take the initiative, as he will know that she is punishable.
- Constant criticism. Unreasonable criticism of parents and teachers could seriously affect the child's self-esteem, reducing it to zero.
- Narrow social circle. The less a person communicates with people, the less friendly he is. Closedindividuals are more likely to suffer from low self-esteem.
Attention to appearance
Maybe it will surprise someone, but insecure men try to look very stylish. A person wants to show his own individuality with his appearance. The person acts like a peacock who opens a beautiful tail in front of females.
Men with low self-esteem follow fashion, decorate their bodies with tattoos and make trendy haircuts. External gloss helps them feel their importance. But behind the outer shell lies an insecure person. A person with high self-esteem will not attach much importance to clothing. He will dress neatly and tastefully, but will not blindly follow all fashion trends.
Fear of speaking your mind
The psychology of an insecure man is this: I won't say anything, no one needs to know what I'm thinking. Guys with low self-esteem are never the soul of the company. They look like gray mice that hide behind the backs of merry fellows. They often have no opinion. They can think anything, but they will speak out in the way that is customary to do in their society. These guys will not go against the system and defend their interests. They will put up with any development of events, as long as they are not personally touched and not forced to change something or argue with someone.
Closed gestures
The behavior of an insecure man is appropriate. In any society,will try to isolate himself from people. And since it is not in his power to build physical barriers, a man will fence himself off with gestures.
Taking closed poses, crossing arms and legs, a person will demonstrate insecurity and stiffness with all his appearance. And if inspiration suddenly floods over him, and he decides to tell something, then his gestures will be too constrained and angular. The viewer will not be able to notice any wide movements.
Lower self-esteem
It is not surprising that a person who is insecure will have low self-esteem. He is too modest and shy. Afraid to talk to a stranger, even if you need to ask for directions. Low self-esteem does not allow a person to perceive himself and his activities correctly. Such a man will unintentionally belittle his talent and say that he is mediocre, even if this is not at all the case. And such thoughts will eventually lead to the fact that a person will not perform his work in full force.
Closedness
One of the signs of an insecure man is the lack of friends. And if he has comrades, they are few. Insecure people cannot communicate normally with others. Strong personalities will use the weak to achieve their goals. Therefore, insecure guys believe that no one can be trusted. Such a policy is formed in them not only in relation to peers, but also in relation to the older generation.
A reliable person is easy to exploit and won't resent. Soover time, under the pressure of society, even the most good-natured modest guy will turn into a closed individual, gloomy and taciturn.
Does not want to take responsibility
A person for whom mom or dad decided everything from childhood will not be eager to make decisions on their own. After all, if you take responsibility for your actions, you cannot blame someone for failures. I have to admit that I made the mistake myself.
Boys who grew up under overprotection cannot even admit to themselves that they are capable of making a mistake. After all, my mother said from childhood that her son was smart and capable. And in order to maintain this legend, you need to shift the responsibility on your neighbor. But the laurels of victory in case of success, you need to try to win back yourself.
Looks up to others
The other person's opinion is very important for an indecisive person. Such people will not compare themselves today with themselves yesterday. They will compare themselves to those around them. And if a person looks good against the background of others, then you need to continue moving in the chosen direction. His dear man can not go. After all, the opinion of others is very important, and an insecure man values them very much. Therefore, you need to do things that will definitely please a larger number of people nearby. Men with low self-esteem will never be inherently liberal. They will live their whole lives guided by the policies of the conservatives.
No hobbies
Any normal person should be interested in something outside of work. Hobbies form passion in a person and helppass leisure time. Insecure individuals cannot find a decent occupation for themselves and spend their leisure time watching TV shows or playing computer games. Guys with low self-esteem are afraid to take on any undertaking. Fear of being judged and fear of failure will bind their hands. In his imagination, a man may be a professional tennis player or a professional artist, but in reality he will never develop his abilities until he starts making efforts to fulfill his dream.
No friends
People can live normally only when they communicate with others. And if an adult lives without friends, it is worth thinking about his normality. It is difficult for a closed person to make acquaintances, but nevertheless, in your 20-30 years you can find at least one person who is close in spirit.
Insecure men quarrel with their friends and significant other all the time. Such individuals complain of constant betrayal and misunderstanding on the part of others. But when such complaints are received on an ongoing basis, one somehow does not believe in the sincerity of the person's words.
Jealousy
One of the signs of an insecure man is jealousy. At the beginning of a relationship, a lady may even like this character trait. But over time, any, even a sentimental girl, gets tired of constant interrogations and suspicions.
A man will demand that a woman spend as much time with him as possible. And it won’t matter to him, his missus agreed to spend thisa day with her friends or she would like to go shopping. He will always impose his company on her and therefore will be very annoying.
Talking about feelings all the time
How does an insecure man behave in a relationship? He quickly confesses his feelings to the girl and will demand confirmation of his love from the lady. The wording of the question would look like this: "Do you love me?" And the lady will respond with a statement so as not to hurt the feelings of a person. But an insecure man will want more. A simple "yes" in response to his question is not enough for him. He can talk for hours about his feelings and find out from the chosen one why she preferred his candidacy to all other men. Such a game will please the guy and annoy the girl.
Tied to parents
A man who has no friends will spend a lot of time with his family. And it would seem that there is nothing wrong with that, if it were not for the influence that a mother will have on her son.
How does an insecure man behave? He will indulge his mother in everything, who will be his idol. The opinion of other people, even a beloved girl, will not matter to such a guy. If mom said that you need to change jobs, then it really needs to be done. If mom said that you need to part with the chosen one, then it's time to say goodbye to the girl.
Doesn't take criticism
A man with low self-esteem will criticize himself all the time. Eternal self-doubtactions will leave an imprint on the human mind. And if someone from the outside criticizes him, he may react very inadequately. You need to be more understanding with people who do not know how to accept criticism. They should be given instruction in the form of good advice, not strong instructions.
Living someone else's life
A person who is not sure of himself will be afraid of his true desires. He will postpone the implementation of his ideas for a future that will never come. A man will work where he will be well paid for his activities. And he may not even get much satisfaction from work. But then he will have a stable income, which is so respected by society.
An insecure man does not have enough strength to achieve his girlfriend. Therefore, he will create a family with an affordable woman who will reciprocate. Such a life will burden a person, but he will never find the strength to change something in himself.
Envy
A person who cannot achieve much will be jealous of others. He will also want to buy a new car or a new house. But a low-paying boring job does not allow you to get the things you want. An insecure person will not think about changing the place of service. Indeed, in his picture of the world, stability is the key to success.
How to deal with an insecure man? Don't give him a reason to be jealous. There is no need to be silent about successes, but it is necessary to talk about them as something quite natural and ordinary. Then the person will notreact violently to your words.
Fight against complexes
15 signs of an insecure man have been described above. But nothing is permanent in life, which is good news for guys who want to change themselves. With daily work on yourself and on your character, you can completely rebuild your personality. If a person does not have enough strength, relatives and friends can come to the rescue.
How to help an insecure man? Very simple:
- compliment him;
- raise your self-esteem in every possible way;
- admire the activity;
- help find a hobby;
- help get rid of excessive modesty;
- teach him to follow the gestures and not close himself from the world.