Problems in life arise in the life of every person all the time, but, unfortunately, not everyone knows how to cope with them. There are those who prefer a heroic battle to stand quietly in a trench, waiting for the enemy to leave on his own or for someone to come to the defense. Such a position is fundamentally wrong, and such an approach to problems must be resolutely fought.
How to solve problems instead of hiding from them or waiting for someone to solve them for us, specialists in human psychology know. In view of the increase in the general stressfulness of modern life, psychologists willingly share with others valuable advice on overcoming life's difficulties. They all agree that every person should by all means learn to solve problems on their own.
Identify the specific problem and its importance
Losing keys and being fired from work, losing a tooth and amputating a leg can be considered a problem. Sometimes a person can write down a life situation in the category of problems, withwhich he has never encountered and which forces him to actions that are unusual for him, knocking him out of his psychological comfort zone. Therefore, before driving yourself into stress, it is worth considering whether the problem is far-fetched.
At the same time, it is important to clearly highlight existing problems. You may even have to make a list with their enumeration. The next thing to do is to determine the weight and urgency of each problem. It is important to understand which ones should be resolved first and which ones can wait. You should not rush to solve everything in one fell swoop, as you may simply not have enough strength for this, and the quality of such a decision is greatly reduced.
Cultivate the Right View
After the true problems are identified and the order of their resolution is arranged, it is necessary to proceed to the next step - the formation of the correct view of them. Of course, the complexity of situations is different, however, before proceeding with the resolution of each of them, it is necessary to think about what useful things can be learned from it. It sounds strange? Not at all.
The solution to every problem requires you to display one or more qualities at once. This means that the development or training of certain character traits can be considered a positive aspect of each of them. In addition, in difficult situations, we can become more active and smart, we learn to think and behave outside the box. According to scientists, leaving the psychological comfort zone is the best way for a person to personal growth.
Pacifyemotions and make a plan
Before solving problems, you need to subdue your emotions. Panic and anger do not allow us to soberly assess the situation and our actions; under the influence of feelings, we tend to act illogically. Almost everyone who at least once made a decision based on emotions instantly, later regretted it more than once.
To successfully solve various problems in life, you need to draw up a detailed plan of your actions. It is worth starting to compile it immediately after emotions have subsided and the ability to think sensibly and rationally has returned. Do not forget that the plan for overcoming the problem is just an outline, consisting of intended actions. It is necessary to tune in in advance that it will have to be corrected. Moreover, this can happen both before the start of its implementation, and during it.
Combat the fear of failure
Often the biggest obstacle in how to solve problems is fear. It paralyzes and makes it difficult to see clearly the picture of what is happening. We are usually most afraid of failure, we are afraid that the plan we have drawn up will turn out to be a complete failure or that additional unexpected difficulties will arise. How to deal with your own fear?
First, try not to dwell on the thought that something will not work. Drive away these thoughts as the most terrible enemy. There is only one way to overcome fear - by accepting it and doing what you are afraid of. Try to fantasize in the opposite direction. Imagine that you succeeded, feel in your imagination the taste of success and satisfaction from the fact that you have reached your goal, and the problem is left behind.
Arm with advice
To understand how to solve problems yourself, it would be useful in some situations to talk about what torments you to those you trust. Sometimes this alone can help, because as long as you state the whole essence of what is happening, highlighting the main thing and trying to convey it to the listener in an understandable language, everything will also clear up in your head, settle down in places. It is possible that after this, a decision will suddenly dawn on you.
If this does not happen, then a loved one whom you have dedicated to the essence of your problem, firstly, can help you emotionally, and secondly, can give you loving and sympathetic advice. It would be especially good if this person ever faced a similar problem in his life. Or maybe you can find someone who can provide practical assistance?,
Imagine your crash
Great psychologist Dale Carnegie advises to get rid of the panic fear of failure to look her straight in the eye. In other words, you need to believe in success, but at the same time clearly realize that no one in this world is completely immune from anything. Why think about failure, isn't it discouraging?
Dale Carnegie explains this by the fact that in a problematic situation, a fiasco for many means the end of life. They are terrified even for a moment to imagine that everything will end in the worst way for them, and they have no idea how they will be afterthis to live. According to the psychologist, having thought over in advance our actions in case everything does not go as we hope, we protect ourselves from panic fear of such a turn of events and will not be completely at a loss if everything happens.
Rate the problem globally
When you need to solve a problem, try to look at it from a different angle. For example, if you have nothing to put on shoes, look at your problem through the eyes of a legless cripple. And if you're upset about having a fight with your husband, look at your problem through the eyes of a recently widowed woman. If you are not satisfied with the quality of your life, go to the cemetery. Gloomy? Believe me, this will help to shift your problem from the center of your life just a little.
And you can try this way - look at the Earth, at yourself and at your problem from space. Can you imagine how small it will seem then? Imagination, it turns out, can be used for such useful purposes. Also, when a problem that has arisen puts too much pressure on us, you can try to imagine how we will remember it in a year or five years. Maybe then it will turn into a funny life story that we will amuse our friends with?
Don't forget to rest and don't "saw sawdust"
Psychologists, who know better than anyone how to solve problems with the least loss for themselves, advise not to forget that the body always needs rest. Experiencing stress, which absorbs the lion's share of the energy produced by the body, a person loses strength. Add themquantity will help complete physical and emotional rest.
Especially weakening a person is constant regret about something that caused a problem or prevented him from successfully overcoming it. You should not “saw sawdust”, that is, return your thoughts to the past again and again in order to regret it properly. This is meaningless. If your current problem is about something that cannot be changed in any way, try to distract yourself from it and not scroll through it constantly in your head. What happened, you will no longer affect, but what can happen to your he alth, your thoughts really influence.
Armed with the advice of experts, you can safely enter the battle with your problems. It would be foolish to expect some kind of miraculous ending to this fight, but the fact that thanks to the right approach, problems will be solved much easier can be counted on without a doubt. Remember, everyone is capable of solving their own problems, and no one is put in to do this dirty work for you.
