How to prepare for the wedding: tips and advice from priests

2024 Author: Miguel Ramacey | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 06:11

Perhaps the most beautiful of the seven sacraments of the Church is the wedding. It is shrouded in some kind of mystery, secrecy. God brings together two hearts, two souls. A man and a woman - now they vow to be in joy and sorrow, in we alth and poverty, to live in love, mutual respect and support each other throughout the long journey of their joint stay on Earth. How can young people prepare for this sacrament? This will be discussed in the article.

Semantic load

In any church sacrament there are two sides - external and internal. As a rule, our attention is attracted by the external, and we think about the internal last. But it is precisely the meaning of all church sacraments that you need to know first of all.

Where to start and how to prepare for the wedding completely, so as not to lose sight of anything? First of all, the ceremony must be agreed in advance. To do this, they choose a temple and drive up topriest. In large cathedrals there are special departments for registering and ordering treb. You can go directly to the priest, or you can turn to the servants, and they will tell you everything. If young people want to hear the singers, and even the whole choir, then this must be agreed upon in advance. This point needs to be immediately clarified: do the young people need to separately contact the head of the choir or the priest himself organizes everything. All this may need to be ordered from the registration department.

When a priest is asked how to prepare for a wedding, he, first of all, will advise you to start with a confession. Yes, yes - from confession. Often young people first come to the priest and talk with him. This is very good indeed. After all, getting married is not difficult - it is difficult to live on. Therefore, the task of the priest is to understand how young people take a conscious step, how responsibly they approach marriage, understand their roles in this important union. First of all, this is a church sacrament, which means that everything is done before God.

Work for the Glory of God

The main purpose of a person is to unite his soul with the Heavenly Father, overcome sin in himself and live according to the commandments. Young people do not create a family for fun. It is work, a constant sacrifice for the sake of another. If God blesses, then there will be children, and this is even more work and self-sacrifice. Do all newlyweds understand this well? Therefore, to the question: “How to prepare for the wedding?”, the priest will say: “First of all, inwardly … Bare your soul before God and test it: is it ready to live for the sake of another, is it readyto go with your other half to the end and on the other side of being to appear together before the Heavenly Father and as far as this desire is not dictated by emotions, which, when they subside, will no longer brighten up difficulties and you will have to accept everything as it is …"

Why should I go to the priest?

In the conversation, the priest talks about the understanding of marriage in the church sense, about the order and blessing of the union of the young. If a young couple has serious intentions for each other, they will listen to the priest and try to take his advice on how to prepare for the wedding correctly and according to church law, and not just for the sake of a beautiful ceremony. Then, during the wedding, the newlyweds will understand the meaning of what is happening.

Often, a priest recommends reading certain chapters from the Holy Scriptures, something from the Holy Fathers' writings, or he himself will tell about important aspects of this sacrament. All this was said for those who are interested in how to prepare for a wedding in the Orthodox Church, although Catholics have much in common in conducting a wedding ceremony.

The wedding day is discussed with the priest, but it cannot be fasting time and on the days before Lenten days. In general, according to tradition, in the Orthodox Church, marital intimacy does not occur during fast days. Of course, everything should be consciously and only by mutual agreement. If one of the spouses is against it, then it is possible for the second to yield, so as not to introduce him into sin on the side. If a couple is churched, then they understand everything. If a husband and wife do not know and do not understand anything in church traditions, then it is better for them eitherask or talk to a priest. Since not everyone is ready to live completely according to the charter of the church, everything needs to be understood and reasonably accepted.

Important Ordinance

Sufficient literature has been written about how to prepare for a wedding in the Orthodox Church, which can be easily purchased at the church or taken to read in the church library.

Previously, the ceremony of the wedding itself included the communion of the future spouses. This suggests that the wedding took place during the Divine Liturgy. Marriage is a great Sacrament, thanks to which the husband and wife already become, as it were, one body, they are united together in Jesus Christ for salvation and entry into eternal life. Today, communion is no longer included in the sacrament of the wedding, but the meaning itself has not lost its significance. All the same young people become one in Christ. Therefore, before the wedding, future spouses need to go to the Divine Liturgy and take communion. Before communion, of course, a person fasts and confesses.

Not only newlyweds go to get married, often long-married couples resort to this sacrament. It is worth saying that the preparation for the wedding of those living in marriage is no different from the preparation for those who are just about to follow this path. Unless, in conversations with a priest, the conversation can go in a slightly different direction, because these people are already husband and wife before God, although they live without blessing. Such couples may be more conscious and responsible about the sacrament.

What else do you need

Let's turn to the outside, whichalso important for people going to the wedding. The rules of preparation speak, first of all, about the internal, but they do not lose sight of the external either. That is why the rite is so beautiful and touching.

Of course, the wedding needs rings. They are bought in advance and given to the priest before the start. It happens that rings are sold right in the temple.

Today everyone buys gold rings. It is interesting that, according to church tradition, a silver ring is put on for a husband, and a gold ring for his wife. And even earlier manuscripts generally speak of an iron ring for the husband.

There are crowns above the heads of the bride and groom. They are held over the heads of young friends of the bride and groom. The crowns just symbolize the royal path of Orthodoxy and at the same time the martyr's path of the spouses. It's not a field to cross, and not even a river to cross. The article mentioned above that a husband and wife, in a certain sense, sacrifice their interests for the sake of the second half, and together they live for the sake of children, if God blesses the marriage with them.

Family

Do not neglect the opportunity to learn how to prepare for the wedding ceremony in the Church correctly and why you need to come to a conversation with a priest.

It happens that children are not born for any reason. This does not mean that God has turned his back on spouses. We can not understand and accept everything, but regardless of us, everything has its own meaning. Do not despair, and certainly do not need to leave each other if there are mutual feelings. There are enough couples in the world who were not destined to give birth to children, but they were able to give their love and care to otherschildren left without a family. It is even possible that they did not raise other children, but they did something important and significant in this life. Even if they just loved and helped each other to live and not lose heart, this is also good. In general, it always makes sense to live and give love.

Icons

While wondering how to prepare for the sacrament of the wedding, young people begin to understand a lot. And, if the meaning of everything that happens during the performance of this church rite touches the heart to the very depths, without causing resistance, then, most likely, the young are on the right track.

What remains of the spouses after the ceremony is wedding icons. Parents can give them, or you can purchase images in the temple. Often, mothers themselves embroider icons as a sign of the blessing of their children. As a rule, this is the image of the Savior and the Mother of God. Before the wedding, they are also given to the priest along with the rings. The newlyweds will also have wedding candles. They can be bought right before the ceremony or purchased in advance to decorate them at your discretion.

Cloth under the feet

Still need fabric for the wedding. How to properly prepare for this ceremony, our parents and grandparents know well. In the past, mothers embroidered wedding cloth for their children. Young people get on it. The color of the fabric is white. Today, it is rarely embroidered by anyone, mostly bought. By the way, the tradition of laying a towel under the feet of the bride and groom was preserved even in atheistic times. He was laid in the registry office, and they still do it. The canvas can be bought in a special store, in the market or directly in the churchshop.

Even having learned everything about how to prepare for a wedding in the Orthodox Church, there is still an excitement that is absolutely difficult to deal with.

Important

There is another important point that was not mentioned above. This is, as it were, implied. Those wishing to receive the sacrament of the wedding in the Orthodox Church must be baptized in Orthodoxy. And it is also desirable to be believers, which plays an important role in the salvation of a person's soul. And the family is a small church. Where the husband is likened to Christ, and the wife of the church. Children are their children. All together they sail to God in their ark. Only now this understanding has been lost in people. A husband must tremblingly protect his wife, take care of her as a faithful friend of his and mother of his children. To do everything so that they do not starve, do not need, they can learn and improve, enjoy life and thank God for it. And the wife is the guardian. Faithful companion and homemaker. Is this true in today's world?

About rings

So, now the newlyweds know how to prepare for the wedding in the church, that the spiritual component is important first of all, and then the external one.

The bride and groom wear rings to each other - a sign of an eternal and inseparable union. The gold ring on the wife's finger symbolizes the brilliance of the Sun, and the silver ring symbolizes the light of the Moon, reflecting the daylight. The husband is likened to the Light in marriage, and the wife is likened to a lesser source that receives his light.

Rings are an outward expression of the inner readiness of two hearts to love each other before death and beyond. After all, according to the Christian worldview, life does not stop. We are eternal. And death is only a temporary state. Therefore, second marriage is not accepted among Christians. Even if someone became a widower. After all, how to be then before God? So, they say I have two, three wives or husbands? In Christianity, marriage is swan fidelity. And who does not understand this, think - is it worth getting married?

Deep feelings

Here it is - a wedding in the church. Preparation for it carries not so much an external meaning, expressed in the troubles of arranging a ritual environment, but an internal, spiritual one. Love and infatuation are not the same thing. Love is deep, not superficial and capable of strong deeds. Love thunders loudly, ignites quickly, hot to the point of burning, but cools down as soon as it meets a small hindrance to its burning.

A lot more can be said on this subject, but only better about love than the Apostle Paul said, hardly anyone will say … Read these words, find them, they impress and convict at the same time. The beginning is: “Love is long-suffering, merciful, love does not envy, love does not ex alt itself, is not proud…”.

Conclusions

To summarize: the main preparation for the sacrament of the union of two loving hearts in God is fasting. The Holy Orthodox Church says that newlyweds are recommended to prepare themselves for the wedding by the feat of fasting, repentance, prayer and communion.

Day and timediscussed in the temple with the priest. For the ritual side of the sacrament, you must have:

• Icons of Christ the Savior and the Virgin;
• wedding rings (at the choice of future spouses, it is possible without symbolic expression, but it is also possible taking into account traditions);
• wedding candles;
• canvas.

Guarantors

What should wedding witnesses know? In the old days, when there was still pre-revolutionary Russia, a marriage concluded in the Church was legal before the State. Therefore, the witnesses, by their signatures in special books, confirmed (testified) that these people became husband and wife not only before God, but also before people and the state. They usually knew the newlyweds well and vouched for them.

Druzhok and druzhka, as they were called by the people, took part in the sacrament, and while the bride and groom walked around the lectern, they held crowns over their heads. They must also be baptized in Orthodoxy. These are kind of guarantors before God. Like godparents for a baby, although it is difficult to vouch for adults. After all, they have their own head and their own thoughts. But we can pray for each other. Ask the Lord for blessings and help. And this is the work of God. So Christ commanded: praying for each other is one of the manifestations of love.

In the rite itself, nothing has changed. They also still hold the crowns, and probably at this moment they are thinking about their future.