“Love will suddenly come…”, - is sung in an old song. Indeed, she comes when you "do not expect her at all." No one can fall in love (as well as out of love) of their own free will or according to a plan: it always happens suddenly, like a lightning strike. Sometimes the feeling captures so much that the whole familiar life fades into the background, and the person already thinks like this: “What should I do? I fell in love crazy!" It seems that love is something to rejoice, because it is considered a gift from God. This is not always the case, because sometimes it begins to bring not joy and happiness, but only torment and suffering. So what to do, if you fell in love "to death"?
Thunderbolt
This is how those who experienced love at first sight often describe the moment of falling in love. Oddly enough, but this suddenness is more characteristic of men. They are able to fall in love with a girl in one minute. It should be noted that their feelings pass faster than women.
It has been noticed that even an insignificant trifle can attract a guy in a girl: high-heeled shoes, a special haircut model, lipstick or dress color, look, gait. Men are very attentive to such details and it is on them that they, as a rule, “sink”. Here is such a phenomenon, and it is inherent in just the male part of the population. In other words, a guy who sees a girl in a miniskirt on the street may fall in love with her legs or her walk. At the same time, the strength of the feeling that has come can be so great that he will think: “That's it, I fell in love "to death".
The agony of love
What can a macho do, pierced by such a powerful feeling? Of course, to get acquainted, and if the girl does not mind, then develop and build relationships.
If a guy fell in love with a girl, then all the obstacles and obstacles are nothing to him. Men are creatures no less sensitive and vulnerable than women. Therefore, they perceive it so painfully when a girl ignores courtship or refuses at all. It's good when love is mutual, but it doesn't happen very often. Therefore, the pangs of love have to be fully felt by those who do not receive reciprocity.
Dangerous age
As a rule, people experience such strong feelings at a very young age. The love that they feel lives, as it were, by itself, because, due to the immaturity of their psyche, they still cannot fully control emotions with their minds. Therefore, youthful love is sometimes so tragic and painful. No wonder it is at this age that guys most often commit suicide because of unrequited love.
Howact to achieve reciprocity?
Let's imagine that a young man falls in love with a girl. What should he do to be able to be with her? Much depends on the girl herself. That is, whether she is free, whether she has a desire to build a relationship, how old she is, with whom she lives, whether she even knows this guy and is aware of his feelings. In fact, a lot depends on such moments in the future development of the novel.
After all, if it turns out that she is already dating someone or she simply does not like the new admirer, then what should the one who fell in love with her without memory do? It remains to be hoped that she will either part with her gentleman, or pay attention to another applicant. For this to happen, the latter will have to try.
You will need to do everything to achieve the chosen one, arrange surprises for her, invite her to those places where she likes to visit. You need to find out how she lives, what she likes to do, what kind of food she prefers, what films and music she watches and listens to. Girls are very fond of when guys are interested not only in their external data, but also in what is hidden behind them. This is how you have to act if you fell in love like a child.
Waiting for an answer
While there is no reciprocity, the lover will have to go through all the "charms" of unrequited love. To make the waiting less painful, you just need to shift your focus of attention to another object. For example, you can find something to your liking, resume a hobby if it has been abandoned. Playing sports helps a lot, and any. They not onlywill benefit in terms of physical improvement of the body, but will also give confidence and vigor. And these results will never hurt anyone.
Love should give rise to only the best feelings and aspirations. No wonder they say that it makes a person better, kinder, softer, more tender, more sincere. To achieve a girl with whom you fell in love at first sight, sometimes you need to take non-standard steps. Women love such men very much: they immediately understand that everything is done for them, and who can resist beautiful deeds? Previously, knights fought to the death in duels, climbed into the palace windows along the smooth sheer walls, went on military campaigns for the sake of beautiful ladies.
So, if you fell in love with a woman, so much so that you lost sleep and peace, the only comfort will be the opportunity to be near her. Whether it will work out or not depends solely on the enamored "Pierrot". Or rather, from his perseverance (within the limits of decency, of course), fantasy, courage and depth of feeling. Women love stubborn men and usually give themselves up "at the mercy of the winner."
She, he and she
It's good when a strong love overtakes a lonely young man. This is natural, normal and fully fits into the concept of procreation. You can congratulate such a guy and say that he is lucky. Not everyone gets to experience the power of love during their lifetime.
But there are other situations that are not so happy, at least for one side. It is about when a man who is not alone falls in love with another woman. On the one hand, for him it isjoy, but on the other - great torment.
After all, he understands that in this way he betrays both his “official” woman and his lady of the heart. Men, being in this position, are aware that they hurt all the participants in this love triangle.
Of course, the one who was betrayed is the worst. They no longer love her, do not want her, her place in the heart of a man is occupied by a rival. And while the once dear woman is tormented by uncertainty and betrayal, her loved one thinks: “What should I do? I'm in love, but I'm married!"
Signs of love
The dilemma is not an easy one. It affects the fate of several people. Unfortunately for some and fortunately for others, almost all married men fall in love with women on the side during their entire marriage at least once. Some explain this by the loss of feelings for the faithful wife, others by the fact that they were simply “covered” at the sight of a beautiful, sexy girl. Interestingly, even 40-year-old men, wise by experience and life, are unable to resist this storm of emotions.
Scientists have long proved that falling in love, especially bright, lightning-fast, is nothing but the result of our biochemical processes that occur in the brain. For this reason, a person is simply not able to control what is happening to him. He loses sleep, appetite, he is no longer interested in those things that have long been part of his life. So, work moves aside, a man abandons his hobby, does not pay attention to his wife. And only one thought pulsates in my head: “What should I do? I fell in love … What ifis this serious?”
Leave or stay
In such a situation, giving advice is a thankless task. No one ever, firstly, listens to them, and secondly, if someone follows them, then he also blames the adviser for all the troubles that happened to him.
If we proceed purely from considerations of decency and elementary cleanliness, then an unfree man who has fallen in love with another lady either needs to go to her (if these are serious feelings, of course), or love her exclusively platonically. This may be the answer to the question: “What should I do? I'm in love, but I'm married!"
Love without joy
Even a man fell in love with a girl platonically, but at the same time continues to live with his wife. Is it fair to him? Somehow not so much. It turns out that a man should step on the throat of his own song because of the fear of destroying his family or because of moral principles. Sharing a bed, life with one, but thoughts to be with another? No one can stand it for long.
What to do if betrayal is unacceptable, and living in the old way becomes unbearable? There are few options, and you need to choose the most painless for all interested parties. You need to understand that at the behest of the mind, falling out of love like this right away will not work. Therefore, you just need to wait out, so to speak, the active phase of this period. It will last several months, maybe even a year. Everything will end faster if you don’t see the one that almost ruined your whole life.
That is, everything must be done not to meet this woman, not to go to her places"a habitat". If this is a colleague, then communication should be reduced to zero, and even then, only on professional topics. Minimizing contact really helps a lot. But there is such a thing as thoughts. They arise in the head sometimes without demand, and it is difficult to get rid of them. When you once again want to think about this girl, you need to accustom yourself to immediately switch your thought process to another topic. Doing this from time to time, you can completely get rid of unwanted memories, images and other things that do not completely cope with love obsession.
This too shall pass
At first it will seem that there is no strength to live without her, that you need to go to her, that she is the one and only, for which it is worth taking a risk, leaving everything old behind. However, these thoughts will soon cease to appear, as the nagging, oppressive feeling that has prevented us from living in peace in recent months will gradually pass.
Soon, very soon, the biochemical processes will stop wandering in the brain, and all experiences, torment and suffering will come to naught. This love can live forever, but falling in love - only from a year to 3 years. You just have to be patient, but don't waste your time either. Why waste it on meaningless experiences? It will be more productive to plunge headlong into some new business, focus on a career, you can go on a trip. By the way, long-distance travel is the best cure for heart pain.
Help from outside
There are also very difficult cases when a person is unable to cope with his obsession on his own. Someone is coming forhelp to friends, and someone to a psychologist. Often these specialists hear in their offices the question: “Tell me, what should I do? I'm in love, but I can't be with this girl yet.”
Patients with this problem are not uncommon. And they all want one thing - to hear from a specialist some simple and effective advice that would help them cope with this difficult situation. Of course, to hope that this will be the case is simply ridiculous. A psychologist, of course, will help get rid of addiction (and strong love is dependence on another person), but this will take time, because an integrated approach is required here. However, one must understand that in the end, no one but the person himself will be able to help him.
Love without memory. What to do with her?
We often hear in life and from on-screen heroes: "Everything, guys, I saw and fell in love with her forever." How do young people act in such cases? Who is bolder and bolder - they immediately come up and get to know each other. Some do not dare to do this and pass or pass on. If they think about this girl for several days, they begin to look for her all over the city. The most desperate can post notices on poles with her signs: with a description of her appearance and the place where the meeting took place. Asks for help to find her, because he fell in love without a memory. And someone keeps this romantic memory and lives on.
If the acquaintance took place, then it is not a fact that it will necessarily move to some other, important stage. Moreover, at closecommunicating, a girl may not make the same impression that she had at the first meeting. And this is far from uncommon. Having fallen in love with some image, you can be very disappointed in what the girl really is. Therefore, of course, you need to communicate in order to understand whether this person is yours or not. After all, sometimes a beautiful face, eyes or legs do not at all guarantee that everything else will be just as beautiful (human qualities, I mean).
Long live love
It is necessary to fall in love, they say, it is good for he alth, prolongs life and makes it more full, colorful and meaningful. The main thing is not to lose yourself in love, because in this format it turns the fate of a person into a nightmare. And this is no longer love, but an addiction that cannot bring joy and creation.
Falling in love at first sight does not guarantee love. In order not to miss your chance, you must definitely get to know the girl better. Or you can just go further: let this bright meeting remain in your memory forever.
