Despite the beauty of romantic feelings, many guys and girls, as well as men and women, are interested in how to get rid of falling in love. There can be many reasons for this: lack of reciprocity, lack of time, emotional imbalance, and so on. Fortunately, psychologists know the means to help cope with this condition.
The difference between falling in love and love
Not everyone manages to determine the line between a fleeting passion and a serious feeling. Moreover, even scientists and psychologists who have seriously studied this issue have not been able to come to a common conclusion. However, a number of characteristics can be distinguished to distinguish between infatuation and love.
Love | Love |
You are attracted to good looks. | In addition to physical characteristics, you also appreciate the moral qualities of a person. |
Happens quickly (sometimes this feeling is called love at first sight). | Emerging gradually as people get to know each other better. |
Feelings are bright, but episodic (they can suddenly flare up and fade away instantly). | Emotions are calmer but permanent. |
A man in love sees nothing but the object of his adoration. | True love does not make you forget about friends, loved ones and work. |
Pass if people are separated by distance. | The breakup strengthens the feeling, making it even stronger. |
Accompanied by violent quarrels from scratch. | Disagreements are constructive. |
People in love are often selfish and only care about their own good. | Love means "we". |
There are a lot of requirements for the object of adoration. | Selflessness and the desire to please your soulmate. |
Do I need to get rid of falling in love?
Before you figure out how to get rid of falling in love, you need to understand whether it is worth doing. Unfortunately, this wonderful feeling is not always good for a person. It is worth fighting him in the following cases:
- if the object of adoration does not reciprocate your feelings;
- if falling in love negatively affects your mental and physical state;
- if you are driven by morbid jealousy;
- if you have a manic attachment to a person;
- if romantic feelings interfere with your studies or career growth.
Unfortunately, not every girl or young man in love can cope with the problem on their own. Rather, they will deny its existence in every possible way. Exactlyfriends and family can notice deviations in time.
Methods of treating falling in love
If you are looking for a cure for love, try the advice of psychologists. So, the most popular are the following methods:
- Prevention will help you prevent an unwanted condition. If you think that now is not the time for love, try to fight all its manifestations: do not read novels, do not watch tearful TV shows, do not listen to sad music, and most importantly, limit communication with the opposite sex.
- Logical comprehension implies that you need to look at the current situation from the outside. Try to evaluate all the pros and cons of your condition.
- In accordance with the Lope de Vega method, it is recommended to critically evaluate the object of your adoration. It is possible that there will be much more negative qualities in it than positive ones.
- The extrapolation method will allow you to look into the future. Imagine how your relationship will develop in a week, a month, a year. If you do not see positive moments in the future, get rid of the crush urgently.
- To put your thoughts on the shelves, lead the right way of life. You must have responsibilities, responsibilities, hobbies. It is quite possible that there will no longer be room for romantic fantasies in the head.
- Honest conversation with a friend, relative or psychologist is the best cure for love. By telling your story in detail, you will most likely come to the conclusion yourself that the feeling is to your detriment.
What does Freud advise?
Sigmund Freud became famous thanks to his bold theory that all human actions are driven exclusively by sexual instinct. However, it is precisely because of this position that many do not take his recommendations seriously. Still, you should listen to his advice on how to get rid of falling in love.
Freud paid special attention to such features of the psyche as sublimation. Love gives a person energy. If for one reason or another this feeling is undesirable for you, try to transform it into another form. Direct this energy, for example, into art, sports, education and other areas. It is possible that you will be able to achieve amazing results.
Change is the best medicine
As you know, in order to cope with this or that state of mind, you need to change external circumstances. So, a girl in love can get rid of an obsessive feeling by resorting to the following measures:
- cardinal change of image (hairstyles, wardrobe and so on);
- search for new hobbies (or you can return to the hobbies that occupied you as a child);
- new interesting acquaintances (possibly with the prospect of a romantic relationship);
- change of scenery (if you can't travel, try to explore your city in search of new routes and places to walk);
- make changes in everyday life (for example, you can rearrange furniture or learn how to cook new dishes).
You can't do without the help of loved ones
If you are looking for ways to get rid of falling in love,Enlist the support of family and friends. The fact is that it is very difficult to cope with heart experiences alone. Sometimes the problem is so acute that only with the help of those around it becomes possible to solve it. That is why you should not be shy about asking for help.
The best option is a sincere conversation. With a friend, relative, work colleague - it doesn't matter. The main thing is to be honest about all your experiences. You will be surprised, but it will immediately become easier. In addition, it is quite possible that your interlocutor has previously been in a similar situation. It is possible that by the end of the conversation you will be laughing together at a problem that seemed unsolvable just a couple of hours ago.
Recognition
How to get rid of obsessive love? Sometimes you need shock therapy. If your lover is not yet aware of your feelings, then why not talk about them directly? Of course, this is not easy, but certainty will come in your life. There are not many options for the development of events:
- he (or she) will reject your feelings, which will certainly serve as a huge disappointment, but will help you free yourself;
- it may well turn out that the object of your affection is in love just like you, but is embarrassed to admit it (in this case, you will have a chance to build a strong relationship with the prospect of further development).
Conclusions
How to get rid of the state of being in love? At first glance, this question may seem silly and frivolous, because everyone goes through romantic experiences. However, it's worthtake into account the individual psychological characteristics of each person. Sometimes falling in love not only interferes with study and work, but can also lead to serious psychological problems and even suicide attempts, which should never be allowed. That is why modern psychology pays such close attention to this issue.