Every woman dreams of a relationship with a strong man who will become a reliable support. But often girls choose sissy. Who are they? How to behave with a man of this type in a relationship? We will consider the answers to these and other questions in the article.
Concept
A sissy is a timid and shy man who can't take a single step without his mother's approval.
Such representatives of the strong half of humanity very rarely make independent decisions. It is very difficult to rely on them in difficult situations. And most importantly - mom! She is constantly present in the life of an already matured boy. It sometimes seems to the wife of such a man that she created a family not with her husband, but with his mother. The mother-in-law regularly participates in the life of the young and gives advice related to the arrangement of housing, the choice of dishes, curtains and other interior items, as well as the upbringing of children. Some mothers of men can even control what the daughter-in-law of her grown-up child feeds.
Mom's opinion
This behavior is often not caused bydespotic behavior on the part of the mother, as many believe. On the contrary, mother and son have been in close spiritual connection for a long time. As a result, a process associated with psychological continuation occurs. In other words, people begin to depend on each other's opinions, and any decisions are made only after agreement.
It is important to understand that with broken separation ties, normal relations between adults are practically impossible. Yes, a man can start a family and have children. He is able to move from his mother to his wife. But in such a relationship there will always be three, and the spouse will feel superfluous, since the man has a close psychological connection with his mother, which has been formed since childhood. Accordingly, it is difficult, and sometimes even impossible, to compete in such a situation. Therefore, if you find yourself in such a "trap", you should understand that it is very difficult to be in a relationship with a person when he is a man - a sissy.
Signs
Sometimes it may seem to a woman in a relationship that her chosen one has a mistress or is of a different orientation, but this is not so. Perhaps the whole point is that the partner extols his adored mother, and you are just a wife for him, who must accept him with all his shortcomings and bad habits.
Main signs of a sissy:
- He constantly calls his mother and asks her advice about a particular situation, a future trip or a planned purchase.
- Most of his free time belongs to his mother. He can witheasily abandon all your joint affairs if his mother needed a little help.
- In the phone call list, you can find many outgoing and incoming calls from dear mommy.
- And you can also find correspondence in which the mother-in-law can give meaningless advice, as well as not speak in the best way to you.
- Your chosen one regularly sets his mother as an example for you. Perhaps he thinks that she is a better cook, more versed in raising children.
- In his speech, you can hear "catch phrases" or quotes from his mother.
- His mom regularly gets into your relationship and clarifies information related to her son's appetite, he alth and work affairs. Moreover, she may be interested in the breakfast, lunch and dinner of her "baby", as well as the clothes in which the man left the house.
- Mama's sons tend to devote their beloved mother to all quarrels, details of family and intimate life.
- Such a man does not want to grow up. He is very comfortable in this state. When his wife asks him to do something, he will easily complain to his mother that his wife “nags” him.
If most of the above signs match, then you can be sure that your man is a sissy. What to do in such a situation? It is up to the woman herself to decide. It is important to understand that sometimes life with such a chosen one becomes unbearable. Often it resembles torture, and it is very difficult to “pull a man out of the tenacious hands” of mommy.
Where do they come from?
Probably every woman at least once in herlife heard such an expression as a sissy. Psychology, namely research in the field of relationships between parents and children, shows that such a situation occurs in families where the mother was deprived of male attention. Often these are single mothers. Sometimes in such families there is a father, but he does not have any influence on the situation. He is either very busy with work, or has not had serious feelings for his wife for a long time. As a result, a woman is overwhelmed by a huge "cup" of unspent love, and at the same time, the need for a reciprocal return of warmth and care. A child in such a situation is the very source, therefore, an unlimited amount of care, guardianship, love and tenderness falls upon him. Unconsciously, a woman begins to raise an ideal man in her understanding, who will experience the same warm feelings for her.
Growing up, the boy begins to feel like the center of the universe. Later, he realizes that no one but his mother is able to guess his thoughts and desires, which means that his mother is the best woman in his life. Of course, our parents and children are the most precious people for us, but the situation with sissies is a little different.
In addition to positive emotions in a relationship with mom, material benefits are often traced. Mothers of sissies are always ready to help immediately. It will not be difficult for them to wash, iron, cook and clean an adult child's apartment. Moreover, she will arrange her "adult baby" in a good job by acquaintance, and also take full control over potentialoffenders.
Benefits
Of course, in men with such a psychological type, most girls find only flaws. Most often, we tend to notice only concessions in relation to parents. However, you can also find pluses in a man who is commonly called "sissy." Psychology highlights the following qualities:
- They are romantics. Men who have a close psychological connection with their mother most likely took over from her part of the female nature and sensitive organization. They are able to make pleasant surprises, romantic dinners and gifts. Such men will easily choose your favorite perfume or bouquet of flowers.
- Care. He will "lightning" rush to your aid if you need it.
- Compliant character. Such a man will not defend his point of view, but will easily give in to you, even if he was convinced of his opinion a few minutes ago.
Flaws
If your boyfriend is a sissy, then you will have to put up with a number of his shortcomings, since it is pointless to fight them. These include:
- The constant demand for increased attention to one's person.
- Lack of initiative and shifting responsibility to the spouse.
- Fear of making absolutely any decisions, even the most insignificant ones.
- Constant consultations with mom on issues in all areas of life.
For some women, this list will be enough to avoid a serious relationship withrepresentatives of this type. The situation is much more complicated if your husband is a sissy.
What to do?
Undoubtedly, an overbearing mother-in-law can negatively influence a woman who is in a relationship with her son. But sometimes the cause of disagreements in the family is much closer than it might seem. Often men behave like sissies when they are allowed to. Who? Wife.
Why does a man get out of bed with a beautiful and sexy girl, and then go to the other side of the city to his mother to have lunch? The thing is that the beloved mother has set the standards of behavior, but the spouse does not. It is very important to make it clear to a man what you accept in a relationship and what is not. And if there are no rules, then there is nothing to follow.
It is important to understand that the observance of the mother's rules and regulations will continue until the beloved woman appears with her demands.
Any girl should make it clear to her man that she expects the same respect as his mother. In addition, the spouse may try to convey to her chosen one that she and the children are more important than all the people around him. Moreover, people from the environment of the partner should be clearly aware that his wife must be treated with respect.
Girl behavior
Everyone knows that a sissy is a man without initiative. It is very difficult for girls with such chosen ones to build relationships.
It would seem that it is easier: do not mess with a sissy, and there will be no problems. Howeverto calculate this type of men can be quite difficult. They may turn out to be a successful businessman or an inflated handsome man. Often, sissies are very attractive to girls due to their romantic nature. But, as soon as the relationship can be equated to serious, then his mother immediately flashes on the horizon.
If you have managed to marry a man of this psychological type, but you want to see the head of the family in your chosen one, then take him seriously from the very beginning. Leave all decisions to your husband. Your partner must understand that you are a weak girl, unable to cope with the difficulties of life without the help of a representative of the stronger sex.
Be feminine
If you want your partner to show his masculine qualities, then do not be afraid to appear weak and defenseless. You should regularly show him your beauty, sexuality and tenderness.
Your chosen one should always want to return home, and there a loving girl should be waiting for him, and not a “saw”.
Be patient
A man who depends on his mother's opinion is very sensitive to criticism and reproaches. Everyone knows that any mother praises her child and assures him that he is the best. As mentioned above, sissies are used to feeling like the center of the universe.
It is in your best interest to learn how to express your dissatisfaction in a calm tone. Try to give arguments and explain in detail the reasons for your dissatisfaction.
Who benefits?
Former - sissy,so we had to separate. Few women are ready to put up with this state of affairs and continue relationships with this type of man. But! If you are a strong woman with a masculine core, then life with a sissy may be a great option for you. Your spouse will always agree with you. Moreover, the fear of female authority will not allow him to change you. Of course, this is not a fact!
In any case, the decision about such a relationship is up to the woman. If she is ready for this, then she will have to come to terms with the authority of her mother-in-law, as well as the indecision of her son.
Tips
Mama's boy is a concept that is often perceived as a humiliation by the representatives of the stronger sex. Therefore, you should not call your chosen one that.
Most women's magazines try to convince any woman of the futility of such a relationship. Some representatives of the beautiful half of humanity share this point of view. Moreover, they are absolutely sure that it is impossible to change a sissy. Psychologists are not so categorical about this.
Let's take a look at some tips to loosen the tight knot between your man and his mother:
- Do not wage open war. Try not to show your chosen one hostility towards his mother. Remember that insults or ridicule against the person dearest to him can scare away, after which the man will easily run away from you.
- Learn from the experiences of others. If your man was already indivorce, which was not without the participation of his mother, then keep in mind that your chosen one treats the female half with caution and distrust.
- Be clear about the boundaries of your personal life. Mark the rules that his mother must not break, and also delicately set the line of what is permitted.
Can it be brought up?
Mama's boy is a "diagnosis". Therefore, it is unrealistic to re-educate such a man.
It is important to understand that in any case, you will have to improve relations with your husband's mother. She has been an authority for your chosen one all her life, so it is unlikely that your re-education will be crowned with success.
As you know, if the situation cannot be influenced, then it is necessary to take control over it. Otherwise, regular omissions with your mother-in-law will not only ruffle your nerves, but also spoil your relationship with your lover.
Try to get out only together with your spouse on trips, movies, theater or hiking. Don't forget to arrange romantic dinners. If you are a real family, then you should spend time together, without involving your spouse's mother.
If you live with his parents, then insist on separate housing. In extreme cases, it will be very difficult to leave later, especially for your chosen one.
