In life, one often comes across the word "vindictive". One hears this word addressed to him, the other calls someone from his acquaintances that. What does it mean - vindictive person? And why are there more and more of these people?
Descendant of the Count of Monte Cristo
A vindictive person is a person who remembers in detail the circumstances associated with offensive facts in relation to him. A person who hides anger and feelings of grief for a long time in his soul and memory. It is difficult for him to forget and even more so to forgive the insults, even if the event happened several years ago. There is a joke: "I'm not vindictive, I'm just angry, and my memory is good!"
Most of these people dream of getting even with those who, in their opinion, are the culprit of their bitterness.
A vindictive person is a portrait of an unfortunate subject. A person who lives on past grievances, who does not forgive offenders, whose bitter feelings corrode her from the inside.
Quite often global grievances and insults that oppressa person for years, with a reasonable analysis, turn out to be small, not worthy of attention situations.
Resentful personality sees the problem in a black light. A person lives in constant constraint of offended feelings and self-criticism. The life of a vindictive person is marred by bad memories, which are given great importance.
Children's grievances
A vindictive person is a sensual person with a wounded self-esteem, who tends to see an unfavorable attitude in his direction from others. Most often, vindictive people become children who observe an example of unforgiveness from tough parents. Asking for forgiveness from a child, treating him as a full-fledged person, reckoning with his feelings is not accepted by most mothers and fathers. Children are perceived as robots, obliged to show emotions and desires only when it is convenient for adults. A rare manifestation of praise and encouragement signs, the maximum number of reproaches and claims, unwillingness to accept parental guilt in front of a child and focusing on bad qualities in the future will bring up an embittered person.
The psychology of a vindictive person speaks of a line of behavior copied in childhood from close relatives who lived and were nearby. That's exactly what they did.
Resentful person - what is it?
Many are interested in this question. To understand why a vindictive person holds a grudge for a long time, it is worth analyzing his inner world.
Spitefulness and vindictiveness are badqualities, most often they belong to a weak personality, unable to relate to other people's opinions easily and naturally. Usually these are gloomy individuals, unable to build friendships for a long period of time. They are very demanding of others, not wanting to put up with other people's shortcomings, not noticing their own bad qualities.
River of Bitterness
The vindictiveness and vindictiveness did not make a single person happy. Feelings of constant bitterness, like worms, eat a person from the inside, making it difficult to feel the taste and joy of life. Constantly thinking about his offenders, a person loses the ability to enjoy pleasant events. The habit of anger subsequently flows into eternal suspicion and makes one treat the entire society with complete distrust. A vindictive person dooms himself to loneliness and dissatisfaction with life.
Resentment is fraught with some danger, and also:
- Feeling great resentment with a touch of helplessness.
- Being obsessed with insults or bitter acts towards oneself.
- Lack of forgiveness and generosity.
- Destruction of harmony, peace of mind.
- Ignoring a benevolent attitude, looking for enemies and enemies.
A person who lives with old grievances, constantly replaying unpleasant situations in his memory, actually has a hard time.
Being in an oppressed world of heavy emotions, a vindictive person may be aware of this or deny it, but at best he will try to change hisessence and attitude to insults.
Necessary changes
It is possible and necessary to fight negative feelings. With some effort, a person will learn to see the situation from a different angle, get rid of his hypersensitivity and revenge plans.
- Positive attitude. Do not take seriously the actions of others in relation to yourself. Each person has personal motives or mistakes in dealing with people. It is necessary to perceive abusers as inexperienced children who tend to act stupidly.
- Emphasis on the positive. Watching the wrong actions of other people, you should analyze their motive, looking for something good for yourself.
- Constructive attitude. Calmly watching the offender's unsuccessful attempts to inflict pain, a self-confident person makes him feel annoyed and annoyed, while protecting his own he alth and inner balance. Not reaching his goal, the enemy sooner or later stops inflicting "moral blows", experiencing further respect for such a strong, self-controlled person.
- Indifference to the opinions of others. Gossip and criticism will not cause any moral injury to a person who is indifferent to public statements.
Smile into the future
Life is multifaceted and interesting. A harmonious person is not subject to the concepts of "revenge", enemies, "resentment". He enjoys the world around him and relationships with people with dignityparrying sidelong glances and sharp words. Encountering unfair relationships, he draws the appropriate conclusions for himself and continues to move on, leaving the unpleasant event in the past.