Psychologist Marina Komissarova is known for her informative articles on the LiveJournal blogs and is very popular on the vast Russian segment of the Internet. Her articles are devoted to the relationship between a man and a woman, self-esteem, psychological complexes and simply the problems of human communication. Also, the main topic of her blog is women's mistakes in relationships and personality crises. Psychologist Marina Komissarova periodically answers letters from her clients regarding their psychological problems and love addiction.
Psychologist Marina Komissarova and her family
Since Marina has become quite popular in the Internet environment, as a result, blog readers are interested in her personality. Recall that the topics of building love and marital relationships are the main thing that Marina Komissarova (psychologist) touches on in her articles. Her biography is quite rich. She was born in 1971 and lives in Moscow. Marina graduated from the screenwriting department of VGIK in 1993. In 1999, she mastered the Faculty of Psychology and received a second higher education. Started practicing in 1997 while doing research work.
Marinamarried, has two children, enjoys fishing with her husband. The main hobby and occupation in her life is a passion for psychology. She constantly publishes psychological articles, which are consistently successful.
Finding a photo of a psychologist Marina Komissarova on the Web is not an easy task, but not a hopeless one. Our readers can get to know her firsthand.
Our beliefs
Psychologist Marina Komissarova, like every experienced specialist, believes that it is our beliefs and attitudes that determine the events that take place in a person's life. Beliefs are thoughts that we have perceived as truth, the truth for ourselves. And here there is one important point, scientifically proven: if something is repeated to a person many times, then he begins to perceive it as the truth for himself. This becomes the conviction of the individual, which programs his actions and states, and hence his whole life. That is, if you repeat many, many times that you are stupid, you will believe it. And if you repeat as many times that you are capable, then you will also believe. And your faith will be reflected in your success.
Famous psychological experiment
In the USA in the 80s of the last century, an experiment was conducted: students were divided into two groups, allegedly as a result of testing. In fact, they were divided simply arbitrarily. Some were told that they were capable and would be trained in a group for the gifted. The second was told that they had a weak intellect and would be trained in a program for the underachievers. The curriculum was the same for everyone. Eventually,many years later, the successes of graduates from the two groups were evaluated. Those who considered themselves gifted actually achieved success in their careers and studies. Those who were instilled with beliefs about their incapacity showed similarly low performance in their subsequent activities. All this had nothing to do with real abilities.
People always act according to their beliefs. And belief is thoughts that were repeated to us many times and were accepted by us on faith. Therefore, they need to be reprogrammed. Negative thoughts will come from time to time because it is a habit. Marina Komissarova, a psychologist with many years of experience, believes that only a competent correction of self-esteem helps to form a mature personality.
Low self-esteem as an attitude of loved ones
In childhood, we begin to understand our role and place in life, based on how they are defined by people close to us. It still starts long before the moment of conception. Each of us has a father and a mother. Before our birth, they already each have their own opinion about whether they want to have children from each other, what gender, and whether they want to at all. Their relationship is filled with love and respect or hostility and competitive spirit. All this affects the formation of an awareness of your value, because the thoughts of your parents are transformed into an attitude towards you.
If a child is long-awaited, desired, then from the moment of conception he experiences his special value. He feels loved and, having absorbed this state in childhood,in adulthood feels quite deserving of approval. A completely different emotional perception is formed in a child who was conceived as a result of violence or “accidentally”. Such children have a high chance of growing up with an inexplicable guilt complex. Inexplicable, because they themselves cannot really explain what they were guilty of, but they carry this feeling with a heavy burden through their whole lives. Until they direct their conscious efforts to free themselves from the guilt complex.
Consequences of complexes
People struggle with this complex in different ways. Some feel it, and these people can be seen - they seem to feel like uninvited guests in this world, justifying themselves for each of their actions. Such people prefer to be seen and heard as little as possible by others, their behavior shows that they are trying not to stand out from the crowd.
But there is another strategy of behavior. Some unconsciously push this feeling of inferiority out of their consciousness and repress it. That is, the sensation itself is there, but it’s just that a person puts a block on feeling at least something, and outwardly this translates into the behavior of a narcissist and an egocentric. Looking at such people, it is often said that they do not love anyone but themselves, but the truth is that such people cannot feel at all, and simply focus on satisfying their physical needs. In fact, it is the lack of unconditional love in childhood that is to blame for both manifestations.
Narcissism and its causes
And, by the way, to all of usThe well-known Greek story about the proud and handsome Narcissus perfectly illustrates this strategy of behavior. We remind you that according to the generally accepted interpretation of the myth, Narcissus was unusually handsome and could not reciprocate any person who fell in love with him. But let's ask ourselves the question: why was Narcissus like that - cold and incapable of loving other people? Here it is worth returning to the scene of his conception. Narcissus was the son of the river god Cephis and the nymph Liriope. The god Cephis took possession of the nymph by force, that is, in fact, Narcissus was born as a result of violence. Could his mother's dislike of his father reflect on him? Of course. And then there is nothing surprising that Narcissus could not love other people, he simply did not learn this in childhood, did not absorb this lesson with mother's milk in the literal sense.
People with the so-called highly inflated self-esteem, in fact, suffer from the same thing as people with low self-esteem, only they choose different ways to overcome the internal conflict.
Parental influence and programming
It also happens that parents want a boy, but a girl is born. In this case, the little creature feels that something has not justified the hopes of its parents, but it cannot understand what exactly. From this feeling follows the assimilation of the child that for some reason he is not good enough. If parents do not feel love for each other, and most importantly, respect, they begin to eradicate in the child what they do not like in their partner. Constantly convincing him that there is something in him that needs to be corrected or destroyed. Parents do this without realizing that each of us has innate traits that cannot be eliminated. And the only consequence of such behavior is that along with the phrase “you are the same as your father”, the child acquires an internal conflict.
Blog "Evolution"
Psychologist Marina Komissarova has long been one of the most widely read authors on the Web on the topic of psychology. Readers' reviews are full of gratitude for the fact that her articles help to understand themselves and understand the essence of their problems, explain how to become a self-confident person and overcome insecurity and complexes. It all starts with awareness and understanding of your ineffective behavior patterns. Difficulties in partnerships, conflicts in communication - these are the problems that the Evolution blog touches on.
Marina Komissarova (psychologist) gives specific advice and psychotechnics to get rid of complexes and fears. People who visit her LiveJournal page write that her articles help to understand the issues of building relationships between the sexes, finding the right path in life and increasing self-esteem. After all, a person begins to fight with himself, not knowing that this struggle is obviously losing. And every time he inevitably loses in this war, he begins to experience chronic shame. Shame on being yourself.
Marina Komissarova (a psychologist who has repeatedly encountered similar problems in her practice) believes that several of these factors are usually intertwined.
Problem Solving
If it so happened that we were not given enough love in childhood for various reasons, do not despair. Our parents gave us only what they could and as much as they could. And if there was little love in our life, this does not mean that the situation is irreparable. We ourselves can give ourselves as much of this feeling as we need. Moreover, having learned to love ourselves, we learn to love the whole world and, over time, make up for the lack of love, not only our own. We give it to our loved ones in such a volume that they accept themselves and begin to feel a sense of love for us.
